It’s amazing, the roller coaster ride of foster care/adoption. You can spend hours reading, listening, learning all about what it takes to be a foster parent, the adoption process, the heart aches, the rewards. But it seems no matter how hard you try and prepare yourself, nothing can prepare you for your own journey. It’s different for every case, and different for every day.
Sometimes, it feels like this is “faith calisthenics”. I am trying not to imagine God as the old cranky phys. ed. teacher that barked out orders at her trembling, fearful little subjects. Or that He is the drill sergent, snarling out “Drop and give me 20 soldier! You think you got faith? Let me see just how much faith you really have!” I would prefer to think that what God is doing is causing us to really strech the measure of our faith beyond what we thought we were capable of. He is clearly showing us just what He can do, as long as we continue to put our trust in Him, and only Him and keep our eyes fixed on His goal and not ours. But in order for that to work, we have to be willing to entrust Him with the greatest gift we have ever received; the love of a child.
There is a element of physical exhaustion that goes along with all this, and I suppose thats what leads me to feel like it’s calisthenics.
“25Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. 26Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. 27No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.”